It?s not like I am, nor ever was a rocket scientist in this or a past lifetime by any stretch of the imagination, mind you. Yet, I felt like I had been paired with a guy that channeled Forrest Gump on a daily basis. I guess at first I just assumed it was an act he was putting on. Someone his age couldn?t really be that much of an idiot could he? How on Earth could a light bulb this dim figure out how to even dress himself? In the early stages of dating Jim*, I misinterpreted his inability to hold a conversation as a nervous habit. Making small talk didn?t seem to be one of his better qualities either. Yet, being a shy person by nature myself, I didn?t read too much into his lack for the gift of gab.

I found myself becoming more and more frustrated with him as the days turned into weeks and the weeks turned into months. I?d stop and remind myself that it wasn?t his fault he couldn?t intellectually spar with me. Of course, that was usually after I had blown a fuse and chastised him for not knowing the answer to certain silly, or at least to me anyway, questions he posed for me on a regular basis. I think the phrase that sent me over the edge more often than not was, ?What does that mean' There wasn?t a day that went by that Jim didn?t pose that question upon me. Of course, his lack of knowledge made me grow increasingly impatient. How could this be? I began to wonder. I have always been a mellow, patient person. Why all of a sudden am I losing my cool so often?

Half the time, I might as well have been speaking another language to him, because he didn?t understand most anything I tried to talk to him about. This, in time, created an even bigger crack in our already rocky relationship. I grew distant and sought the solace of friends because I so craved an intellectually stimulating conversation.

I began questioning my own sanity. Was I going crazy? Was I really speaking that far over his head? I felt like I was losing I.Q. points every second I was with him.

Being faced with his lack of intellect and my realization that this relationship was going nowhere fast, I realized that it was time to sit him down and have a talk. Easier said than done, I thought to myself. How is he even going to understand what I am saying without me giving an explanation of every other word I use? How am I going to ?not? come across as some highbrow beeoytch? A few weeks passed as I attempted to get my game plan in place. Much to my surprise, he knew ?the talk? was coming. We were out having dinner at one of our favorite restaurants when he started the ball rolling. ?You?re like the smartest person I?ve ever met,? he said. ?You?re really intimidating to be around, not only because of your beauty, but because you?re so smart! I just feel like I need to let you go so that you can be with someone that?s like smart and stuff.? I left dinner that night rethinking my thoughts about Jim. Maybe he wasn?t really as ignorant as I thought he was. Maybe he really did get it after all.

Jim and I have maintained a wonderful friendship over the years. Despite how miserable I was during our courtship, I wouldn?t trade that time of my life for anything. Just as any other situation I?m put into, I try to grow from it and walk away having learned something new about myself and life in general. Thanks for the memories, Jim.

*Name has been changed to respect his privacy.
10/02/06